nice girls

One time a guy asked me if I was a virgin, like he was hoping i was. how creepy. once i got over the shock of someone actually asking me that, i told him no, of course i wasnt. he was disappointed and said, “but… I thought American girls were different. I thought you were a nice girl.” 

A nice girl. what would make me a nice girl? if i didnt have sex? so would i also be a nice girl if i was a virgin who drank the blood of first born children? i’m pretty sure in order to be a ‘nice girl’ you have to not be a slut but it is okay to slut shame other girls. that is why taylor swift is a nice girl, right? which reminds me, you probably have to be white to be a nice girl. i mean, yeah. you have to smile and not say anything that might be substantive or argumentative or, like, thoughtful.  if you come out with some kind of feminist-y shit you are not a nice girl, because feminism is such a DRAG, ugh. and most feminists are ugly, duh- they’re just jealous that men don’t like them! a quiet, constantly pleasant, virginal conventionally attractive girl is probably what being a ‘nice girl’ actually means. but it’s just some meaningless throw away phrase right? of course.

This whole idea of ‘nice girls’ makes me want to vomit. on a guy. because women aren’t supposed to have all of those gross bodily functions. it’s natural for men to let their body do what it does, but for women it is unacceptable- we are dainty creatures and our sweat and menstrual blood is unclean and wrong! and men should NEVER have to see any of that! ugh, they deal with enough inconveniences from us, don’t they? we are always going on about our problems and making up drama, wanting to be treated like princesses (whatever the fuck that means). we bore men with our stories, they don’t want to listen to us talk!

I also like that the equivalent of this term- a ‘nice guy’ is usually meant to be a guy who has enough tolerance for a woman that he can deign to treat her like a goddamn human being for awhile, even if he really just wants to sleep with her. yeah, the ‘nice guy’ always turns out to be great and really values women for their intellect and humor.